Garden Hat |The Many Hats of A Gardener

Gardener Hats

Guest post by ‘NRP’

Got your garden hat? So you finally were able to get your hands on your own little piece of Paradise and want to build / grow a Garden.

I’m writing this article to describe some of the different aspects one must know for this adventure. The different gardening hats one might wear, so to speak.

[Ken adds: ]
Looking for actual gardener hats? Check these out:
Best Gardener Hats on amz

(Jump to the most popular garden hat shown at the end)

Which Gardener Hat Are You Wearing Today?

NRP continues:
I am not an expert on the subject of a “Master Gardener” (I can grow a heck of a batch of weeds though). But I want to touch base on some of the steps in taking that ‘hunk of land’, or as I call the above ‘my little chunk of dirt’ and turn it into something that you can be proud of.

To be a gardener, you might have to wear a variety of different hats:

The Hat of a Geologist

When you put on your Geologist hat:

What is the layout of your land? The rock formations, do you have a slab of Sand Stone 2 feet under your Garden Plot?

Is your land rich in Humus or is it good for breading more rocks upon more rocks?

Is the spot in a slight valley that will flood when a storm hits? How well does your dirt “drain” or does it stay soggy for weeks after a storm? How about when it dries, is it a piece of Concrete?

Hydrologist Hat

You must be a Hydrologist to understand where the Water is going to come from:

Do you have a well on your land? How deep? Is the water ‘Good’?

How about a fresh water spring or creek? Does it dry-up in summer?

Do you have Irrigation Water, how long will you need it per year?

How about expensive “City Water”? At what cost?

Put on your Chemist Hat

What chemicals are in the water you have to use? City Water for example may have a LOT of chlorine in it. Too much chlorinated water kills microorganisms in garden soil, organisms beneficial to plant growth and health.

What about the PH (alkalinity) of your water? Is it good or bad for what you’re going to grow? Is your soils Acidic or Alkaline, do you know the difference?

Does your irrigation have run-off from HUGE commercial fields that have sprayed pesticides in it?

Are you someone who wants nothing to do with fertilizers or are you good to go with Miracle Gro and a shot of 20-20-20 once a month?

Equipment Operator Hat

You’re going to plow, roto-till, backhoe that original Hard-Pan dirt just to break it up into football sized chunks.

You will work that soil till it’s at least workable with a Shovel. This laborious step sometimes takes a very long time. Working the soil, then reworking it till it becomes “Fluffy” so you start to amending it into “Garden Soil”

Garden Scavenger

Now for the fun part, ya must be a Scavenger.

Finding all the Horse poop, Cow poop, tree trimmings, cut grass clippings and anything else you can find to add to that soil to break up the chunks and add the nutrients.

While you’re out scavenging keep a lookout for the ‘Stuff’ you’ll need to build the Shed, Fence, Gates, so-on.

Carpenter | Plumber | Electrician

Ya need to be a Carpenter to build that Tool / Garden Shed. Don’t forget that fence you’ll need to install to keep out the critters.

A Plumber to install the Faucets or Irrigation to the Garden Spot.

Also you might to put on your Electrician hat to add a electric fence to deter persistent critters from ruining your garden.

The Hat of a Laborer

Here we go with the Back Breaking part. Gardening is a laborious thing.

You will become very familiar with the shovel as you dig and then dig some more to turn in additives to the soil for example.

You’ll need a good Hoe & Shovel!

We having fun yet?

Do Meteorologists Wear Hats?

You need to be a Meteorologist too.

Which plants will survive your climate? What climate zone do you live in? What seeds / plants are suggested for your area?

How long is your growing season and what affect will that have on the varieties you choose?

Do you get a lot of rain during the summer? Too much? Not enough?

Smart Shopper

Next we need to be a “Smart Shopper”. Do you buy and plant seeds? Or do you get a jump on things and spend 20 times as much on “Starts”? Maybe a little of both?

Here we need to decide whether or not to buy more soil amendments, or take a chance with what you’ve already done will suffice?

Biologist Hat

How are you at Biology? Do you know the “Good Bugs from the “Nasty” ones?

Do you have a problem with squashing a Horn Worm (you do know what that is right) that’s munching on your tomato plants?

How are you going to keep the gofers and moles out of the Garden?

Birds, Grasshoppers, Cut Worms. Can you recognize a Honey Bee or a Hornet, are both good?

Product Manager

NOW we’re ready to toss in a few seeds. Cool, what do you want to grow? Now you need to be a product manager and decide what is going in the dirt.

You’ve got to plan the garden. Know what grows well together and what does not grow well together.

Know how much surface area you need for each plant variety and plan accordingly.

Groundskeeper Hat

You will be wearing this hat A LOT! Can I say, WEEDING? I’ll leave it at that.

Kitchen Cook Hat

Now we harvest 50 pounds of tomatoes, so now you become the Cook, Canner, Dishwasher, and Head Tomato Peeler, along with the other 500 pounds of Harvest that all comes in at the same time!

It all seems to happen at once. So you will be putting on your kitchen hat and be very busy in there for awhile!

Gambler Hat

Ohhhhh yes, one more, are you a good Gambler?

Someone tell me that Gardening is not at times a Crap Shoot!!! HAHAHAHA!

In Conclusion:

In conclusion; Are you a Gardener? Think about everything involved in the process!

Please, Enjoy “getting your hands dirty” it’s good for the Soul.

Thank You


Best Garden Hat?
FYI, this is the most popular garden hat on amz ;)

The most popular garden hat.
Best Garden Hat?

(check price here)

Continue reading: Vegetable Garden Yields To Expect

Fast Growing Vegetables

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No wonder I am so tired after gardening!

Thanks Ken.
Good editing job I will admit, hehehe


I am so disappointed. You missed the most important one – THE TINFOIL HAT.

hermit us;
I keep that hat (THE TINFOIL HAT) reserved for when inventorying all the Home-Canned foods.
Is 200 quarts of Tomato Sauce to much?
Let’s not forget the 700 rolls of TP


Yeah, butt I have a silo full of Corn Cobs… HAHAHA

Good one!
Its what keeps homesteading interesting!

I have had a Tilley for many years. You will appreciate one with the strap on windy days – hated chasing the others across the field before I got this one. Machine wash and just like new.

Don’t forget the good ole boonie hat. I have several. They are hard to beat.

River Rat;
I agree on the Boonie Hat for sure, have a few myself.

Methinks NRP’s article ( a good one by the way) is about handling tasks as they arise, not hats.

Had a saying in my parts that went…………”I ain’t the (fill in the blank), I ain’t the (blank’s) son, but I’ll be the (blank) until the (blank) comes.”

or, something like this…”I ain’t the mechanic, I ain’t the mechanic’s son, but I’ll be the mechanic, until the mechanic comes.”

Plug in any skill. Basically saying, if you have to, due to circumstances, you will handle whatever task you’re faced with, a “jack of all trades”.

Survival requires it.

I think you’re right. I still like my boonie hat.

Actually I like the changes.
Makes a lot more sense.

I liked the analogy of the article. One must never judge a book by it’s bindings. In this case the article was step in progress of life of a prepper. How fitting even though you changed NRP’s original it is still very good.

Nah. I read and enjoyed the whole article. I also noticed the ad for the “best garden hat”. Still say for the money, it’s a boonie hat every time. But yeah, I get it. Good job NRP.

The hat thing threw me off I thought it was a buyer’s guide on the best hat to wear when gardening, which was cute, but NRP isn’t about cute so I read it and found it quite engaging. All the different aspects of gardening is something to consider. So thanks.

These days I am bald so I have to wear hat. It is miserable getting a sunburn on top of the head.

I used to wear baseball hats in my younger years until my farmer relatives started getting skin biopsy every year after age 40 on the neck and cheeks.

I converted to and now wear a Tilley hat in sunny weather for all outdoor activities. The nylon one is well made and tolerates machine washing.

Most chefs I know wear baseball caps in the kitchen. The 2 year cooking programs require a dress code and the chef’s toque is a part of the uniform. Chefs are, by nature, a rebellious lot so many I know of switch over to the baseball cap as quick as they can once they are out of school. As long as it keeps their hair out of the food, it is all good.

Bald heads get cold so I switch to a fleece beanie in cold weather.

I forgot to mention another important aspect of the broad-brimmed hat: ( the models are attractive butt I noticed one thing about the hats.)

The fabric on the underside should be non reflective dark color if you are spending a lot of time looking through binoculars/spotting scopes or rifle scopes. This also aids fishermen that are using polarized sunglasses to spot the fish or structure beneath the water.

If you spend more than 2 hrs in the field, the darker fabric combined with the right glasses will cut down on eye fatigue in the bright sun/allow you to spot structure or the fish/hit that distant target.

Guess I’ll be coloring the underside of the front-facing brim darker tone. Dark grey? Dark green might be better. Thanks for the advice oltimer..

Good article.

I like the benign neglect hat – permaculture and high annual rainfall let me wear it quite often.

As a general rule, I wear baseball style caps. One goes on my head as I walk out the door. I do wear a straw hat for mowing the pasture. It’s a sight to see. Been ran over by a bush hog innumerable times as I mow under low hanging branches of the scattered trees, and it’s tore off my head. Seldom get the tractor stopped before it’s under the bush hog and chunked out by the spinning blades. It doesn’t come close to resembling the cowboy straw hat it started life as, but it still serves to keep the sun off my head, and…….it sort of matches my personality. Rode hard, put up wet, ain’t ready to quit. My wife hates it…says it looks tacky. For that reason alone, I don’t see me ever giving up on it.

“For that reason alone, I don’t see me ever giving up on it.”
So how is that sleeping in the Barn working out… HAHAHA

I’m with Dennis on the baseball hats, although don’t even wait to get out the door before putting one on. I have a drawer full of them of every random logo – many of which were freebies at a trade show or from an employer – I’m not fussy. They are all beat up, sweat stained, and paint splattered…..but run through the washer so…. nice and clean.

During cold and flu season I’ll wear them pretty much full time, though at night when congested I’ll sometimes wear a ski cap in bed – does wonders for the ear, nose and throat (we call them “medicine hats” in our household with 4 kids).

Bought this for Mr. He likes it. They have several colors and it is priced well.
Henschel Crushable Soft Mesh Aussie Breezer Hat, Olive, Large
Sold by: Services, Inc

NRP (and editor Ken),
Loved the article!
Even in my limited space gardening I still wear most of these hats. In fact, had my biologist’s hat on last weekend as I spotted the first baby horn worms on a couple of tomato leaves. Not only did I have no problem squashing them, but they got a stern talking to as I picked through my plants and killed them off.
I’ll call it my “disciplinarian hat”… which included a liberal dose of all of the below:
“What do you think you’re doing?”
“Oh no you don’t… not on my plants”
“Do you think I don’t see you?”
“I don’t think so you rotten little “bleep”, “bleep” ”

Glad to see you survived your trip… Happy Independence Day!

NRP and Ken,
I read every word! Fun and smart article :)
Happy July 4! Now put on your hat and get in that garden!
luv ya’ll, Beach’n

A poormans gardener soil litmus test.

1/2 cup soil
1/2 cup vinegar


1/2 cup soil
1/2.cup water
Add baking soda


Good stuff Joe c! Now how to fix the problems you discover with your tests? Today we can buy soil amendments to improve a lot of things.

From my studies in permaculture I found a trend when your modifying your soil.

If it’s clay add organic material (makes it lighter)

If it’s sandy add organic material (allows it to hold water)

If it’s acidic add organic material (soil bacteria well fed fixes it)

If it’s alkaline add organic material (soil bacteria well fed fixes it)

Maybe that’s why dirt farmers of old times managed to do well with lots of “Muck” as composted animal manures was called. They didn’t have soil tests available but would have loved them. We should be able to do better than dirt farmers with all the useful information on the web.

Now an alkaline salt flat is not going to be improved enough to grow a survival farm. Please MOVE. I mean if your waters so alkaline that it tastes like soap and gives you diarrhea Move…

If your soil doesn’t grow dandelions your likely to have a Round up problem and nothing heirloom will grow well there for quite a few years as soil bacteria breaks it down. Or maybe your garden site was a petroleum dumping ground (don’t ask me how I learned that…).

Today my gardening is a interesting hobby. We can make reservations at a restaurant or go to Kroger’s for dinner fixings. Once SHTF (like EBT cards failing or) you don’t have those options so your efforts have to be well thought out. Only so much time, man power and only so many seeds. My beloved teases me that I have a seed fetish as I am always picking up a few more packets when I see them. Kept in a crisper drawer I’ve found even 3 year old carrot seeds are more than 50% fertile. A damp paper towel test is easy enough AND I have transplanted them with tweezers successfully.

Yes-umm 👍

So after I read this article, what appears on Facebook – ads for sunhats. Creepy.